Ok. That’s !@#!% funny: http://www.nationaldayofslayer.org/
Quote:
DO NOT use headphones! The objective of this day is for everyone within earshot to understand that it is the National Day of Slayer. National holidays in America aren’t just about celebrating; they’re about forcing it upon non-participants.
5. Why is a goof-ball, made-up “Religion” featuring an interstellar dictator named Xenu * so appealing to rich actors like Tom Cruise and John Travolta?
* Why yes, you’re right. That is Scientology.
4. Why is there a magazine called “Teen Prom”? Is there any other kind of prom?
3. Why don’t any automakers manufacture a minivan with a turbo and sports suspension?
2. Why do some people implicitly trust the Bush White House, but believe that all journalists not employeed by Fox News and the Washington Times are part of a massive, Liberal conspiracy to deceive the American people?
1. Why do people buy brown sports cars?
For the record, my basic objection to President Bush and his administration is not his policies, but rather the lack of candor. It’s the unwillingness to take responsibility for failures and the refusal to provide raw, un-spun, unflattering information, especially in regard to the situation in Iraq.
Future generations will judge Mr. Bush against presidents like Truman, who made it clear that “The Buck Stops Here”, or Kennedy, who took public, personal responsibility for the Bay Of Pigs fiasco. These leaders understood that it was more important for people to trust the Office of the President, than for them to have a good impression of the person holding that office. Trust is built and maintained by acknowledging the truth, even when it isn’t flattering or convenient. Read the rest of this entry »
I am trying to make up my mind about the on-going debate over our illegal-immigrant population. Congress tried to make it illegal to be here illegally (scratches head) and people of Hispanic origin are staging massive protests around the country to demand the right to clean our toilets and serve us french fries provide a better life for their family. It must really suck to live in Mexico. Regardless of your take on the issue, you gotta respect them for what they go through to be here. (Although, if Mexico is so bad that you’d walk across a desert, live in a house with 27 other people, and work four crappy jobs at once - why would you drive everywhere flying the Mexican flag? Or wave one at a rally? I must be missing something.)
To be honest, I would be happy to grant them all amnesty, as long as we could ban that polka music. I’m serious. They can have citizenship and free health care and maybe even a complimentary, luxury pickup with six little Mexican flags and their last name in big decals across the back window. Just please, no more polka. I want to cry whenever I hear it, it’s so awful.
That’s something the average American could get behind. If the pro-illegal-immigrant faction offered that as an olive branch, they’d be amazed by how quickly the issue was settled: “No more tubas and accordions? Done. What color should we paint your new pickup truck? Green, white and red? No es problema.”
Go edumacate yourselves on the economics of Unions. Read Dave Away From Home: Union Label.
It’s warm, and Spring is just getting started here in Denver. We didn’t get a Winter this year, just an extra three months of Fall. I don’t mind one bit. Put a half-inch of snow or ice on the road and my 30-year-old BMW handles like a 2,000-lb, greased water balloon.
Usually I see at least two State Patrol cars during my commute, but today they are nowhere to be found. I put the peddle to the floor and let all 98 little carbureted horsies run free. Oh baby! I’m even able to get into the fast lane and do a little passing. So what if I’m only passing a mattress that’s fallen off the top of someone’s car. I take what I can get.
By now you have hopefully heard of the rapidly-escalating feud over some cartoons originally published in a Danish newspaper.
Basically, the cartoons included caricatures of the Muslim prophet Mohammed. Islam prohibits any depiction of Mohammed, much less mockery, and LOT of Muslims around the world are very upset, protesting and boycotting everything Danish. Muslim leaders have demanded that the Danish government both beg forgiveness and punish the newspaper and its editors. Read the rest of this entry »
Took one of those on-line tests determine my political label. Read the rest of this entry »
I recently saw the movie Munich. If you don’t know, it begins with the massacre at the 1972 Munich Olympics, in which a group of Palestinian terrorists took hostage and eventually killed 11 members of the Israeli team. The movie follows the team of Israeli assassins who were dispatched to kill the principle planners of the Munich attack. The events of the Munich attack itself unfold in sequential flashbacks interspersed throughout the movie.
Munich is powerful and worth seeing because the film’s director, Spielberg, did something unusual: he made every person in the film human. You might expect that with the ‘good guys,’ the team of Israeli agents. But Spielberg also does this for the ‘bad guys.’ Read the rest of this entry »
Congress passed and the President signed a law which makes it illegal to send email or post messages on a website with intent to “annoy,” if you hide your real identity. (link)
*cough* unconstitutional *cough*